Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
