it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
You made out with two different species that night
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
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