Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
