Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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