You're my little dorito
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize