I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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