I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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