Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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