this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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