8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
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