come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
