Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
i dont even know how to be here
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
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