I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize