i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.