If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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