I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Randomize
