Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
