whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
You are a genius and a whore.
Randomize
