its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize