idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
