I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Please, let me fuck your mom
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
We have started to decorate penises.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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