nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
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Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
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But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
lol hangovers are for mortals.
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