I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
my sisters under your porch take her home
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
