she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
You left your phone here
Wait...
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