i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
