found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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