i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Randomize
