Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize