it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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