I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
