May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Randomize
