Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
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