i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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