yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
