We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I would fuck him just for his dog
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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