So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I want to stick my p in your. b.
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
3 2 1 whiskey
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
