So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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