Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize