i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
