just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
