shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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