I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
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