WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize