seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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