I want to have your abortion
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
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