How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize