I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Randomize
