omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
