My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
