I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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