They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
