I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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